Where you actually are
Its not a resort and the sign doesnt say camp in any official way. Its the shed, the deck, and the beach out front. You hire the board here and you paddle out here. Park at 10 SH 1, Bluff, then walk a couple of minutes with the board under your arm. Yellow buoy on the gate. If you follow the ferry signs youre in the wrong queue.
Beach break out front of the shed, when the bank is in. People drive from Invercargill. Its not far, and its not a barreling point, so dont arrive with that in your head. Booties most of the year. Hood if the southerly has been sitting on it.
We will tell you if its a bad idea. The south coast does not care that you drove down. On those days the loungers and the shed are the whole visit, and thats allowed.
Three of them on the deck. They dont match. One leg is short so it rocks, which you will notice and then forget. Blankets live in the plastic box if the wind is up. This is the spot to sit, eat, and wait for whoever is still out there pretending they have one more wave.
Not a sun resort. On a clear day youll burn anyway, so theres zinc inside for $12 if you forgot.
Cash is easier. Eftpos works until it doesnt, and then it doesnt. Beer is 18+. We have had the argument about a beer before you paddle out. You will not win it. Read the rules if you like things in a list.
The hire counter is at the front. Out the back theres a pool table and two gaming machines. Around here everyone calls them pokies. If you grew up saying slots, youll recognise them — old upright machines, not a casino, no carpet that anyone is proud of.
The gaming machines take coins. We dont do eftpos on them. They are 18+ and they get switched off if were the only ones who should be in the water instead. Sandy hands on the buttons is how you get told off by Maree, and she enjoys it.
Billiards is free. Put the balls back. The bent cue is the one with the tape on it. Winner can stay on, unless a lesson is starting and we need the floor dry. If the pokies are having a bad day with your change, walk away — the pool table doesnt keep a score that matters, and the sea is right there.